*Child: Where does wheat come from?
Child: Why not gardens?
Adult: Gardens are to fields as Ben Franklin is to Sam’s Club.
Child: What’s wrong with Ben Franklin?
Adult: It closed.
Adult: Pamida won.
Child: Who is going to do something about Pamida?
Child: Where does wheat come from?
Adult: A seed.
Child: Where does the seed come from?
Child: Where does wheat… oh.
Child: Where does Wheat come from?
Adult: The bottom of a Wheaties box.
Child: How does it get there?
Adult: Famous Athletes.
Child: How do you know they are famous?
Adult: Didn’t you see them on the box?
Child: Why would famous people want to associate with Walmart and circular reasoning?
Adult: Are you for real? Ask your mother.
*Names and dialog have been changed to protect fictional characters. Not based on actual events – except the Ben Franklin bit. — Wheat stock image inspired by Pipe Dream.